We can be a mess but still be a good parent. Allow yourself to be both, as life does not have to be perfect but wonderful!
She is almost five and it still feels like I was waiting for her to come and she was just born the other day, I was celebrating all her firsts and new things. Being a mother is an amazing and out of the world feeling, a best gift any women could get. When a child is born, a women is reborn as a mother. But yes life is no same after this rebirth. This whole new life demands so much of responsibility and commitment out of you that you tend to get pressurized and loose yourself, but hold on and put yourself together as their is no thumb rule for perfect parenting. Perfect parenting is a myth, what works for a child might not work for another one, even if they share same parents, a mother or a father tries to gives the best to their child in spite of all the challenges they face in order to make up for it.
Now being a five year old mother ,I could certainly share my part of ups and downs or bliss and discomfort, as I hear most of the mothers giving so much unwanted advice based on their experiences in bringing up a child, I refrain myself from giving any advice or suggestions until asked for. I do not find this whole idea of pointing out mistakes in others methodology of parenting as we all are still learning with every phase of child’s development, still understanding what could be the best way to bring out the awesomeness in the child. We try to impose our self on the child but we forget that we too need to learn being a parent, a child is new to this world and we are the medium for him to learn things and to understand.
They learn from what they see and not what we want them to see. It is said that if children acts like monkeys, then give them something good to imitate and in this whole process what we learn being a parent is:
#You grow with your child: It is all about your child now, initially it becomes difficult to accept this fact but yes gradually you start living the fact before you even realize it. This is like an everyday lesson applied to each and every decision of your life. Before my daughter, when I used to go to shopping malls it was either the stationery or women’ clothing section for me and now it is mostly the kid’s section. Things change, priorities change and we learn to resist our temptations 🙂
#Patience: Yes we can be patient, as it is the only key to a happy day. Parenting takes a lot of fortitude and patience, and to successfully establish a healthy relationship with your kid it is the main element. Although at times we might feel that we are losing all our patience and its enough for this time, we still overcome it and pass onto the next level of this patience thing. It teaches us somethig very valuable.
#Perseverance: I still thank my mom for being so graciously preserving with us, as it has definitely taught me what I do not want to become as a parent. Lots of good learning as a daughter I practice today to be a good mother and raise a happy kid, as that is all that matters. I cannot be perfect but at least I can be wonderful to my child.
#Sacrifice: It would be quite relatable with many mothers here as from the day one we start sacrificing so much for this little world in our arms, that is the only perfect love at first sight thing in this whole world. For which you, as a mother, sacrifice your beauty, your body, your aims, your career and still manage to smile with the kid as the reward.
#Love:The unconditional one!! The most precious and pure form of love you get is from your child, your very part of yourself. You try to teach so many good things to the child daily and you want your child to be bright, smart, intelligent, beautiful and what not and just once when you hear those pure and simple words of love from your kid it just melts your heart and makes you feel accomplished.
We could be the greatest teacher and friend apart from being a mother. Times have change and no matter how modern or open minded we are today for our kids, that generation gap will always play its part and we might be labelled as one of the narrow minded parent in future. So lets make them friends, be with them, answer all their questions before they start finding the answers outside us.
Things I learnt and am still learning… Leaving it here and want to know what have you learnt being a mother?